Saturday, December 31, 2016

Baker's Dozen and Year in Review

Here we are, in the last hours on the last day of 2016. As per usual, I've put off blogging for as long as possible. Since it's basically zero hour for a year end report, I figured that I had better get on it.

So let's talk about some running, mmmkay? My final race for the year was my 86th half marathon, the Baker's Dozen. The Baker's Dozen is the ultimate in gluttony while running. The whole point of the race is to eat as many treats as you possibly can, all while trying to run a half marathon. What's not to love?
Scott had it in his head that he wanted to go for the win in the eating contest. I didn't want to watch him puke his guts out so I talked him out of it. I'm not sure if that makes me a good wife or a bad wife. I mean, I should be supporting his goals, but who wants to watch their spouse spew doughnut chunks all over the race course? The winner of the treat eating contest gets a gift card for $100, so I understand the temptation, but personally, I would need a LOT more money to go through that kind of agony.
I love you, baby. Please don't eat too much and throw it all up, at least not where I can see, okay?
The race isn't timed, so there's approximately zero pressure. Y'all know how I like that. So we started out at a nice easy pace, and just enjoyed all of the great outfits people were wearing. That's the other fun part about this race. People dress in either a Christmas motif, or in junk food accoutrements. I chose the latter.
He actually was at one time or another. 

Pants with pizza, doughnuts, soda, burgers, hotdogs, and ice cream cones? Check.
The race director also gives a prize for the best jump. I, obviously cannot time a jump to save my life, while Scott did a masterful leap of excellence and grace.
He jumped all the cones when he ran this race last year. We had to do one, for old time's sake. 
I ended up eating 6 treats, while Scott stuffed down about 15. His stomach wasn't thrilled with that amount, but at least it all stayed inside his belly. I believe the winner consumed 60+ treats over the course of the 13 miles, and threw up an undisclosed amount of times.
The dude in the orange head gear is the one who won the eating contest, as photo bombing luck would have it. 
This race not only has fun costumes, great food, and friendly volunteers, it also has some of the greatest swag of all time. 
Medal as big as my face? CHECK.
Who doesn't want a medal that also doubles as a blunt object in case of an attack? It's a glorious thing to see that happy doughnut frolicking upon a field of cupcakes. 
Plus another sweet hat for my growing collection. Get it? Sweet hat?! 
There you have it. The final race report of the year. It's a good thing I have a race each of the next two Saturdays so that 2017 can start with a bang. Let's be honest. It's got to go better than 2016 did, right? There shouldn't be any major life changes coming up, so my training may actually go back to normal! A gal can hope, anyway. 

2016 took me to a lot of new places and races. It gave me a new distance PR. It gave me a better understanding of just what it really takes to get where I want to be. (I've got an ENORMOUS amount of work to do if I'm ever going to make that 100 mile goal.) At this point, I'm going easy, tracking my heart rate obsessively during every run. That's made for some extremely slow running, with a fair bit of walking thrown in. But I have finally decided to do what it takes to get stronger and healthier as a runner.  Getting my heart rate under control will lead to more efficient running, and when you're heavier and slower like me, efficiency is a life saver. 

Here's to a happy and healthy 2017. Get out there and get shit done, cats and kittens. The only time you actually have is now, so do the most you can with it. Carpe the hell out of diem and keep on running. 

Much love,